Skip to main content

Lyme and Grace

I’ve tried to not be super vocal in my daily life about my illness except when it comes down to practical things like “I can’t eat that” and “I can’t go there”, mostly because I don’t want my identity to become wrapped up in being sick and dealing with these issues... or so I’ve told myself. But maybe it’s more about pride and trying to pretend I’m something I’m not... trying to pretend I’m far from weak and that I have everything under control when really I do not and cannot.

Like it or not, it IS part of what I am, and it has shaped who I have become. Suffering has its benefits, and I do not say this lightly: The physical pain I experience daily would have been major cause for alarm 4 years ago. Now, it’s so normal I notice when I’m NOT in pain. The emotional pain of loss caused by health challenges is felt just as keenly. Suffering has caused me to... ⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
1. KNOW GRACE. I did not understand the concept of grace until all of my physical and mental abilities were stripped away from me and I had to wrestle with wondering if God still loved me when I couldn’t do anything for him. Grace says YES he does.

2. LONG FOR THE NEW HEAVEN AND NEW EARTH. When everything was going well, I didn’t fully grasp the consequences of sin or how broken this world is. Now I have a constant reminder in my body that this world is a broken, broken place and I truly long for the day when he will restore and make all things right.

3. IDENTIFY WITH THE SUFFERING OF OTHERS. A dear friend texted 2 Corinthians 1:4 to me the other day and it was such a good reminder: “...the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God...” The people who have comforted me the most have been those who have experienced great suffering themselves. God does not allow things to happen for anything less than his glory. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
Would I gladly give up my struggles for a healthy body? DUH. But on some level, I am thankful for this journey, lonely and frustrating as it is sometimes, because through it I know Christ more.⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ 
Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

A Note About My Siblings

The Original Siblings These are the "siblings". With the last three of the bunch graduating high school this year, I think it's an appropriate time to introduce them. On the left is Liz. An accounting major, she provides the common sense in the bunch. And thanks to her love of musicals, we all are a little more cultured. Next is Aaron. If you're ever in a jam, he'll be the first to help you out. And he'll make you laugh very hard in the process. Then Steph. Whether you've known her for 10 minutes or 10 years, she'll make you feel like an old friend. And she's often responsible for the-- never mind. It's classified. And Nick. Nick can hack your database or take a perfectly composed picture of a sunrise, depending on the day. And he's also got car ride composition covered. Abby. You'll know Abby's been there by the trail of little children tagging along after her. And she keeps us classy in word and deed. Finally Mica...
2 comments
Read more

The Thing I Hate About School

It's consuming. Here we are, last day of classes with four days of finals to go, and I'm consumed with homework. I have no time for people. I HATE IT!!! I like people. I like being with people, doing things with people, talking with people, and sharing real life with people. When I'm spending hours on homework, people have to get skipped. You want to do something with me? Well, I have an opening between 4:37 and 4:52. Would that work for you? No? Ok, how about three weeks from next Tuesday at 12:57? Oh, you have class then? Well, you'll have to go on my waiting list. If a Marketing Plan cancels, I'll let you know. That's basically been my whole semester. As frustrating as it has been, I've learned from it. Not necessarily applied what I've learned, but I have learned. A family friend who works for Campus Crusade in Florida says it well in one of his blog posts: "Everybody has 168 hours each week... The schedule is in your hands. How will you use yo...
2 comments
Read more

Is Caution My Excuse for Convenience?

 If I truly lived to serve Christ with no regard for myself, today I would have... -Had a better conversation with the bank teller -Asked the elderly lady walking down the road in the cold dark if she needed a ride somewhere  Do we as a Christian culture train our kids improperly? Every time I see someone walking down the road, I don't see someone needing help, I see someone who is a potential danger to me. When the bank teller is grouchy, I am offended that they weren't more pleasant and conversive with me. Me. When is it time to stop focusing on the possible dangers of an action, and trust God for the possible encouragement and healing that could come from it? What things do we actually need to consider, and what to we use as an excuse to avoid doing something that's "inconvenient" to us?
1 comment
Read more